Nine Putrid Paint Jobs

When using a car as your canvas, it’s important not to turn it into a hateful, retina-burning monstrosity. Forgive us for wishing these ‘artists’ had found a different outlet.

1. Justin Bieber R8

Audi’s R8 can be described as sleek, wide and sexy, but that shouldn’t allow Justin Bieber to dress it like a g-string. Demonstrating what he sees as acceptable when personalising exquisite supercars, Bieber’s Audi R8 4.2-litre FSI appeared in the Hollywood Hills in leopard-print wrap, revealing a talent for ruining design like he does, well, eardrums.

2. Michael Jackson GT-R

Everyone knows the GT-R is a genuine thriller, but transforming the rear of your Japanese track monster into a 320km/h tombstone for Michael Jackson is a bit morbid. The words “live” and “die” only contribute to the spooky mood – seen here in this photo taken by Rob Shaw – as do the pictures on the rest of the car that depict MJ throughout stages of his life.

3. BMW 635 CSI Art Car

Robert Rauschenberg was asked to complete the sixth car in the BMW Art Car Project. For the project he was given a 635i coupe, on which he imprinted a variety of photos and paintings. The swamp grass on its left side was the pop artist’s way of criticising the impact cars have on the environment, which left the coupe’s looks a little in the marsh.

4. Mansory RR Ghost

Mansory describes its Rolls-Royce Ghost program as “subtle modifications designed to increase the car’s elegance and add a touch of sportiness.” We assume they’re talking about the gold chrome front grille, wheel spokes, striped accents down its side and its paintjob, because nothing says elegance like paint that matches blue leather. Ghastly.

5. Gold Bugatti Veyron

Fed up with the popularity of the 450 Bugatti Veyrons in existence, US rapper Flo Rida decided to set his apart by having it completely covered with chrome gold wrap. It was matched to wheels coated in genuine 24 carat stuff. Unsurprisingly, the rapper soon realised that gold was perhaps a touch tasteless, and his ride was re-done in pink.

6. Bape Merc-AMG 300SL

You can roll a turd in glitter, but what about the reverse? Japanese designer Nigo showed us how after approaching Mercedes-Benz to build him a one-off 300SL Gullwing. Nigo’s brief was warning enough after requesting the car’s original six be swapped for an AMG 6.0-litre V8. But the job went further downhill when Nigo applied his signature camouflage.

7. Ken Done BMW M3

Ken Done has his talents, but enhancing the tough and boxy aesthetic of an E30 M3 Group A isn’t one of them. Speaking about BMW’s eighth Art Car, Done explained littering its bodywork with fish and parrots expressed Australia’s vitality. All we saw, however, was criminal evidence – the car looked like it had torn through a paint store during a cop chase.

8. Mansory Vitesse Rose

Putting a carbonfibre hood on a Continental GT is like asking for low-fat mayonnaise on your Big Mac. But Mansory did it anyway, painted it pink, and called it the “Vitesse Rose”. It not only looks like a Paris Hilton special order, but its happy hue was a thorn through everything Bentley stood for. Fortunately, only three were made.

9. Deadmau5 Ferrari 458

DJ and car-nut Deadmau5 found himself in Ferrari’s legal crosshairs after wrapping his Ferrari 458 Spider in this ‘Purrari’ scheme – apparently a tribute to a computer-game cat. Ferrari used a cease and desist to have him return the car to its original colour. Deadmau5 sold it soon after and replaced it with two McLaren P1s... and hopefully learnt his lesson.